The Job
Janice, a rich wayward child-woman, recently kicked out of her parents’ mansion, struggled to pay rent and to balance her priorities and necessities. Being raised in the palm of her father’s hands and cushioned at every fall proved to be a terrible way to prepare her for life. Her parents finally had had enough when Janice brought one too many guys home and let them take advantage of her parents’ money. That left Janice finding a low paying job that required the bare minimum, as her current skills could only get her so far – or so it seemed.
Janice turned off the engine to her powerful car and gave her blonde hair one last fluff.
“Okay, looking good! Oh shoot! It’s fifteen past seven. Screw it, one last touch-up won’t make a difference”, she muttered to herself, and took out her lip gloss from her Birkins Bag and smeared layers and layers on her lips in the rearview mirror.
She then took out brow gel and concealer, attempting to cover with additional layers that she was hungover from partying. She huffed out of annoyance as she had to figure out which button to hit for her door to open. Uggh, why can’t dad just give me the Porsche 911 instead?! I never even asked for this Rolls Royce. She slammed the door (because her four inch long acrylic nails wouldn’t allow her to hold the handle) and hissed under her breath as she walked into Walgreens.
“Janice! Calling JANICE!” The Walgreens intercom buzzed. She winced – why couldn’t they pronounce it the way I like it? Where’s Mr. Garvey when you need him?
It rhymes with Denice! “You are needed in the DEODORANT AISLE!” Janice checked her watch. Eight more hours of this hell – then what did she have to look forward to, a good three hours in the bathroom for self-care? Oh gosh, why are these idiots so dumb? She walked over to the aisle, taking care to switch her frown to an overly wide smile.
“Yes? What help do you need?” she asked with a false sweet voice, still holding her purse, looking like a customer herself.
“Umm, I was wondering if you can find Old Spice for me? Because I don’t see it anywhere on this aisle.” It was a tall man in his thirties, wearing a baseball cap, his shirt tucked into navy blue jeans – his lips pursed and his back rigidly straight. Why does this guy look like he’s got a rod up his butt? He looked up and down at her shirt for a nametag… or something else.
“Oh, sooo sorry honey, we don’t have that here anymore.” Huh, he’s kinda cute.
“Oh! I’m sorry, you work here? Wow, umm, I couldn’t tell.” He gave her a mock thumbs up.
“Yes, I do, I just got here a little late since I had to take care of my parents, you know. They are not feeling so well this morning.”
“Sooo, you’re late because of taking care of the elderly but somehow you had time to dress up like that and pack your purse with all that makeup?”
“I’m sorry, who are you?” What is his problem? He should be grateful that he’s good-looking, otherwise I wouldn’t even really bother.
“You know I could report you for your rude attitude for customer service?” He took a step closer.
“Oh yeah? Who are you even going to report to? Like do you even know these people?”
“You’re Janice, and your boss is Amy. So you might wanna watch what you’re saying. Did no one teach you that?”
Where’s daddy and his money when I need him? If he was here all he would have to do would be to hand him a fifty dollar bill so he’d just leave me alone. What did I even do? But at least he pronounced my name correctly…
“Oh no, sir! I was just showing a mock example to the new worker here on how you shouldn’t treat customers!” She frantically looked for the newly-hired girl. “Come here, which one are you looking for again?”, her voice an octave higher than before as she tried to wave off her embarrassment with a perfect smile.
She said this while ever-so-slightly putting her arm behind the man, guiding him along the aisle while making small talk. “I mean, the way these new workers are coming in, they may be very smart with the cash register but not so much with customer service. So, I’ve been giving them pointers all this week!” She accidentally bumped her hip against his as they turned the corner.
“Yeah, tell me about it. When there were new interns in the office I worked in, they didn’t even know how to use the copier there!” The guy seemed almost completely distracted. They were now in the hair aisle.
Janice, noticing this, decided to take advantage.
“I’m sure your hair is not an issue to you. I think it looks really good naturally. I double- shampoo every time I wash my hair and then I use this amazing hair mask that gives such a glossy glow. But wow, I mean look at yours! Do you maybe want to try out some of these shampoos? Your hair would look and smell soo good.” As she said this, she took care to shake her hair and flip it around to make sure he got a pheromone shower along with a whiff of her shampoo.
“Wow, yeah um, I also wanted to buy some flowers for my girlfriend. We have a date later”, the guy said reluctantly.
“Ohhh! Okay, well we can first get you the flowers for your girlfriend while I get you what you were looking for. Right over here!” Janice took care to place now a safe distance between the man as they walked. Make him miss it. “Hey! Erica! Yeah, you! She’s a new worker, but she will show you around the flower section and set you up, alright?”
Janice flipped her hair once last time and began to march away.
Even though she pretty much knew there was no Old Spice, she checked anyway. Nope, so Janice quickly found an unused one from her purse. “Here.”
The man took off his baseball cap and held up a name tag. “I’m regional manager Michael Sam, and you have quite a talent, young lady! Are you interested in being a franchise saleswoman? Your parents are very successful, and from what I experienced today I think there is potential in you.”
“Oh, wow! Of course, why not? I’m sure you won’t regret it because I promise I’ll actually try my best. Thank you!”
She leaned in and tried to give him a hug but settled for a handshake.